The effect of emotional abuse on child custody
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What is Emotional Abuse Against a Child?
Emotional child abuse might entail holding back affection, being unkind, verbal badgering , threatening physical harm to the child, making the child perceive they are worthless, destroying the child's belongings or hurting their pet animals. It's a terrible way of being brought up as a kid as they have to endure this emotional pain and in some cases even the father or mother constantly insults the other spouse with uncalled for insults. Children may end up feeling as if their Mom or Dad doesn't love them anymore if they're constantly walking on eggshells.
Some children end up making a valiant effort to be what the insulting Mom or Dad desires them to be in hopes that they will be loved in any case. The result is they are hesitant all the time and worry about what the parent will do or say since the abusive parent’s reactions continuously make them really feel less than average. Unhappy children can become unhappy adults later on.
Signs of Emotional Abuse
Given that there are not any physical signs of emotional abuse, it is tougher to prove than other forms of child abuse. Usually, evidencing mistreatment in the court room will involve the deposition of psychiatrists who are well-versed in emotional abuse, along with statements from the kid and other people who find themselves concerned in the situation.
Based on many cases that legal experts, such as family law attorneys, have handled an allegation of emotional abuse on children plays a major position in awarding a parent the custodial rights in a divorce, legally documented separation or even a paternity court case. The next move is developing applicable evidence to prove the accusation as soon as you really believe that one parent is guilty of abusing your child.
Phase1
The process for demonstrating emotional abuse
begins by submitting a motion advising that you want custody of your
children. Set up things to be able to report conversations and the place
you are being abused. Any and all of the damaging things that were
spoken. Research, in the beginning, where you can submit this in your
state.
Phase 2
Maintain a journal or a diary about
these "unprovoked emotional outbursts" and include what the spouse or
partner says and what they did. Notate any impressions you might have
about what the child saw, thought and felt due to what is occurring in
their home.
Phase 3
Have the child evaluated by a
psychiatrist who concentrates in the field of abuse or neglect by a
parent or guardian. Although the psychiatrist’s evaluation shall be
based mostly on subjective interpretations, her deposition in the court
room, testimony, or written report can help you prove your case.
Final 4
Have
a discussion with the child's teachers and after school care personnel.
Grown-ups who see the kid each day are optimally suited to testify to
specific, destructive changes in the child's character and habits which
may be caused by emotional abuse.
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Thanks for sharing a difficult topic. I agree with tony that emotional and verbal abuse can be worse than physical because you never know when it will happen.
I agree as well as the effect can go on for a lifetime.
an excellent hub, and something people need to understand.
Good information, my friend. I learn much from you. Thanks for writing this. Vote up. Take care!
Prasetio
Worthwhile Hub, but an irony with emotional abuse is this:
There can be one emotionally abusive parent and one really loving, capable, parent who is skilled at finding ways to minimize the damage to the child. Sometimes, unless a child shows signs of damage resulting from the emotional mistreatment/neglect, the court (and anyone associated with it) are required to say, essentially, "Well, this wasn't bad enough to have caused damage to this child."
So, the result is that an emotionally abusive parent can be put on a level playing field with the exceptionally loving, capable, parent. The parent who is insensitive enough (at best) to be emotionally abusive is also likely to be the parent who has no regard for, and doesn't see the value in, the more loving parent's relationship with the children. As a result, I'd venture to guess that emotionally abusive parents may be more likely than better ones to fight for custody. The price that the other, capable/loving parent of those un-damaged, or only minimally damaged, children pay for that "level playing field" can be an unimaginable one.
Hi Lisa,
Yes, I see your point. It also depends on the child. Some grow up with the abuse and prosper in life very well while others may become career criminals or have a bad addiction.
All are not born from movies like "Natural Born Killers". Some parents are so loving they are blind to see their kids doing anything wrong. There is a fine line to being an effective communicative parent.
The picture says it all! The child fearing the shadow of a verbally abusive parent - and having to explain how a shadow could harm him! Thanks ocbill.
kimh,
yes and how the parent may be badgering the former spouse (his other parent) when the child has love or kind words for them. This all comes into play in child custody cases.
Emotional abuse scars a child for life. As you mentioned, it is more difficult to detect, but there are behavior patterns that provide indications of it. When parents divorce, there is a huge impact on the child. There is a tendancy, in most cases, for the adults to forget that there are children involved while they spew their anger at each other. This places the child between the parents, forcing the child to choose or to conform to please both. Verbal insults launched at the other parent are one of the worst forms of abuse during divorce cases. Again, most parents do not realize when they are talking negatively about their soon to be ex-spouse. However, the child(ren) always realize when this happens.
Two thumbs up!!
tonymac04 18 months ago
Useful information. Emotional abuse is in some ways much worse than physical abuse. It is usually very subtle and insidious.
Thanks for sharing and I hope that this info will be helpful to others.
Love and peace
Tony